I understand addictions. I especially understand nicotine addiction. I have had the same demons wake me up at night to sneak a cigarette. Nicotine has caused me to get out of my hospital bed with an IV pole attached, in the dead of winter (wind chill well below 20) to smoke outside wearing only my hospital gown, hospital issued non-slip socks and a blanket thrown over my shoulders. I stood there freezing, puffing, and avoiding the glares people gave me driving or walking by. I was close to getting frostbite on my fingers and face just to have a cigarette.
So, yes, I understand the power and hold a white filtered kiss of death can have on you. You know it's slowly robbing you of life, and yet it feels like gold between your fingers in the middle of the night when you cannot sleep. A cigarette is so small, and yet so huge. It was during one of these freezing treks outside the hospital last December that gave me the will, the courage and the wisdom to quit.
No one knows [unless you've quit, too] how hard it was to return home to the tree house and work through all the triggers here that constantly reminded me I should be lighting up a smoke. The triggers were everywhere, and constant at times. I wore a nicotine patch, and ate Ativan like candy on some days. But I did it. I'm celebrating 9 months of being smoke free.
So when my world was invaded by a smoker I got mad. And I became afraid. The fear of being seduced in a time of weakness by the smells of tobacco is a genuine concern. And the constant stress this has caused is also a concern. I have literally cried every day for weeks now in sadness at my peaceful, slice of tranquility being blown up in a cloud of smoke. But my sanity, health, and well-being has more value than than living on a lake. [at least that's what I'm telling myself LOL]
In order for me to find some peace about moving I've chosen to call on my greatest resource to help me make it through the night, and the next 3 weeks--my sense of humor. Here's a few more reasons the season for lake living is withering away. Hopefully this will be even funnier one Day.... [I hope...]
- I went out on my deck last week and much to my dismay saw a rope nailed from one tree to another. On this rope was a bevy of underwear, blowing in the breeze. Mind you we live right next to a major boat ramp so every boat going by saw the flags of bras and granny panties hanging like a party from the trees. [Ahem... doesn't this woman know I'm the only one allowed to hang my undies out for every one to see??? Oh wait that's on my blog... not for a make-shift clothes line....] Cup of coffee, cool breeze, and Grandma's undies tainting the pristine views.... I have pictures. Dare I post them??? Go ahead beg me... [insert wicked smile]
- Superman & I came back to the Tree House one evening after dinner with plans to lie out on the grass on the point of the island to watch the meteorite showers. When we arrived we found that they had strung lights from every possible tree on the island, the flag pole, and their deck railing--all jury-rigged together with orange extension cords. It looked like the Midway at a carnival. Hello people we live on a lake! Bug City if you use mammoth sized light bulbs near the water in mid-summer. I can no longer see the lake at night because the island is lit up like a frigging used car lot. Hence the carnival music I had playing on my tunes for a few days. remember the Chevy Chase movie about Christmas, and all the lights? This is what their deck looks like. I kid you not... The island could now pass for an airport landing strip. This could be trouble because the Tree House is in the flight pattern for a fairly large airport 10 miles south of here. Yikes!
- They have three vehicles, and are only given 2 assigned parking spots. Last weekend he had a fourth car parked here all weekend he was doing repairs on. Told ya... a car lot. Or the graveyard for Cash for Clunkers.
- They are having a big party this weekend, At least I've been fore-warned. Gulpity-gulp...
- I want to rent a huge industrial strength fan to blow the smoke back down on them from my deck. Monsoon wind-like conditions suddenly kicked up on the lake. Craziest thing.....
...UPCOMING NEWS...I'll be filming the tree house, and will post the video for everyone to take a tour soon. Opie is practicing his opening welcome. He always greets our guests with a warmth, and sweetness that is akin to a red carpet being rolled out. Purely adorable.
Next up, when I get a few pictures of my new place, I'll hold a contest to name it. It will be open to you, my friends, and followers to name. I will award the winner with a piece of my art work. I will add pics as soon as I can. It's a white cottage like bungalow that sits on top of a hill. Get your creative thinking caps on...
I need your help & encouragement to make this move away from the Tree House a fun-filled adventure. All anyone really desires is a simple life, and I'm going to get me one of those! It's already on my Dream Board.
Thank you everyone! Comments are encouraged!!!